In the hardest of times, there is life. Where there is life, there is Christ.. because Christ is life.
This past year has been the biggest year of my life to say it simply. The year with the most joy, the most confusion.. the most peace, yet the most crazy.. the most “planned out” yet the most unexpected.
When Dave and I decided to begin dating, I knew something special was ahead.. my heart was at such a peace before the Lord.. though I didn’t know what exactly was coming.
A few months in, I knew I admired this guy with my whole heart. He made(&makes) me laugh till I am crying, he loves people with such a deep & earnest love, and he strove(&strives) to pursue Christ in each decision big&small.. leading me with a caring heart.. Genuinely seeking to serve me through seeking Christ foremost.
Basically, I felt like I was gunna marry this guy.
After he surprised me with the most beautiful engagement.. my heart was so full.
In the midst of this, I was also planning to go to Kenya for a month this summer.. something I had been praying about for many years... the plane tickets were bought.. and I was preparing to see what the Lord had in store for the summer with those beautiful friends that my heart is so drawn to.
What a cool feeling it was.. Preparing to be in the country of my dreams with people filled with an overflowing joy... in the EXACT same summer I was going to marry the man I adore with my whole heart...!
April was here and wedding season was in full force with showers and planning & I had just run a half in Dallas with Jessie.. but something was feeling a little off.
After our race and in the midst of all the overflowing joys.. I felt like I kept not feeling well and my body was responding in different ways than normal..
The next weekend I was planning to come to Belton with Dave to be with the fam. And that week I definitely experienced the most sick I’ve ever felt. After getting checked out with a family doc, Dave and I carried on with our plans to do some photography that weekend.. and the evening after was just no bueno.
We all ventured to the ER late that night and long story short I ended up in the hospital for a week.. and finally found out that I’ve got Crohn’s disease.
But skipping over some of those details in there... there was so much the Lord was doing that calls for praise and rejoicing!
How cool was it that Dave and I were already coming to Belton that weekend and everything happened there with my loving fam to surround us?
It allowed some really neat family time and growth for us all to be together and go through this hard time together...
Jesus sent so many beautiful people and friends to encourage our spirits!
It is the neatest blessing that the Lord chose to reveal Crohn’s in the season of engagement for Dave and I- that he could learn this process with me and we could be bonded even closer through this unexpected and life-changing event.
After being told about Crohns, some of the first words I heard was “You won’t be going to Kenya this summer” and that was a hard moment... to realize that this disease had come in and changed plans that I thought I had so beautifully lined out.
My heart hurt, I was confused.. and bit frustrated and kinda overwhelmed.
But in that same moment.. Christ gave my heart a big hug..
Telling me to TRUST. That yes.. this stinks. But be patient.. hold fast to Him, let my heart rest.. that He was still in control. I am alive for Him.
Trust.
Dave and I had a cool conversation that weekend when we came back to College Station. About how so much had changed in a week.. not only Kenya.. but some long term plans we had been praying through...
Faithfully, Christ captured us both even more. Holding us tight. Drawing us closer to each other and Him.
Those few weeks were hard.. from figuring out different medicines.. and still struggling with plans changing so quickly and giving God a list of questions for where He had us.
But our Lord just keeps saying: Trust.
Now here we are.. ONE MONTH from marrying David Laws and living in a season of unexpected.. how much there is to rejoice for!
- David got such a neat job teaching at BCS in College Station.. and I an BEYOND excited to be his wife and support through this new season! I am in love with this man! Walking through this whole process with him has been the most beautiful and encouraging thing.. while drawing me so much closer to our King!
- We figured out our living situation in College Station and have a beautiful Church family surrounding us!
- I have gotten to spend some special time with my special family! ..they been so great in helping me with the small details of Crohn's such as figuring out a new diet.. so thankful!
- Being here this summer has allowed me to slow down with wedding planning and enjoy the blessings.
- And Christ has been working on me each day.. drawing me closer to Him and stretching, growing, teaching me through the process.
Wow.
The biggest year of my life so far, but that doesn’t mean there won’t be bigger. As you all know.. we have no idea what is ahead. But we were made to be needy through the journey, needy for our creator, the one True Love: Christ.. who truly is life and has our crazy adventures in His hands.
I am overwhelmed by His love being so displayed in this season by my spirit filled, faithful, best friend and fiance David- it’s an honor to be on this by your side.
Yes, God is good. We are His children. As we cling to Him.. He reveals His beautiful plan. We are alive for Him!
Love y’all!
“Through joy and pain, we worship!”
I desire to do your will, Oh God- your law is within my heart.
-Psalm 40:8
But I will sing of your strength in the morning, I will sing of your love! For you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble. -Psalm 59: 16
